Wednesday 7 August 2013

The crucible

3-day intensive Zen retreat at Gaunts House 1-3rd August 2013 with Daizan Roshi

The crucible: an unassuming first floor meeting room in the east wing of the grand old Gaunts House. 20 people sit face-to-face, knee-to-knee. Some because they're searching for a solution, some because they've caught a glimpse and want to see more, some by accident, some because they feel there's no choice.

We set sail on "the hero's journey", the quest to "heal the king to heal the barren land". Ideas of a soft and gentle retreat of pampering. Cut off those man-made ideas.

Choose a question - no difference between them really. Draw your question within, express anything that arises. No censorship. Ask them their question, witness their response.

Getting your teeth stuck in. It's easy, can I have a new question now? No, just keep going. Ask their question, witness their response. Draw your question within, let it all out. Ask their question, listen to their response. Draw your question within, let anything that arises out.

Frustration, anger, apathy, floods of feelings, memories, quiet. Sweat, tears, hysterical laughter, gentle giggling, quiet. Pour it all into the crucible. Mind you let nothing leak out. Double, double toil and trouble; fire burn, and caldron bubble.

Ask their question, witness their response. Draw your question within, do your best to express whatever arises. Contemplate with food, contemplate whilst wandering in the long grass, contemplate whilst sleeping. Silence.

Quiet whispering, hoarse raspy voices, resonant deep tones, soft speech, quiet. Silent loving compassionate listening, simply your presence, a witness to their journey.

Keep heating the crucible, stirring, the pressure rising. Gradually, in a flash the question disappears. The answer so trivial that you're incredulous you ever couldn't answer it. What cure do we find for the king? Nothing, everything. Nothing gained, nothing found. Only the whole Universe! Ha! The whole thing is ridiculous - is that it? It's profound.

Life will never be the same again. Once you've seen the magic eye image, you'll never again un-see it.
Bright-eyed, bubbly, shiny people. Happy and sad to leave.

Like digging a hole in the sand, once the hole is dug, keeping the sand at bay takes constant vigilance. It's only natural for the sand to pour back in. Practice, practice, practice and one day there may not be any sand.


ZenWays Free Intensive Zen Retreats run throughout the year http://zenways.org/yoga-events.html

 
the crucible at Gaunts House

3 comments:

  1. Thanks for sharing this, Mark.
    Your account is fascinating and inspiring.
    If all goes well, I want to be Gaunt's House for Zenways' next retreat there in September.
    Here's one more silly question: is the 'magic eye image' a particular image?
    (..well, I could search for more on that myself, of course, but thought I'd ask you anyway.)

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  2. Great that you want to go to the retreat in September. You can book by e-mailing Fi at zenwaysyogaandmeditation@gmail.com or by contacting Gaunts House directly. It's not a walk in the park, but I think you'll get on really well with it!

    I don't think Daizan was thinking of a particular magic eye image when he mentioned this in his talk - it's just the concept of it. You look for ages at the lines and squiggles and see just lines and squiggles, then one day the lion/butterfly/sunflower/whatever just jumps out at you. From then on it's the same lines and squiggles, but whenever you look at it you'll always see the image. Does that make sense?

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    Replies
    1. It makes sense in a general way, Mark, but I still can't quite relate what you say about the image to your experience at the retreat - probably because I've never been on one.
      So another reason to put that right and go there!
      Thanks again.

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